When I left the UK it was for me. I was striding out alone to take on the world – I wasn’t going to have any boundaries, nobody telling me what to do, and I was doing everything for me. That all changed pretty quickly, as I met my (now) boyfriend fairly immediately and we decided to continue my adventure together, changing it to our adventure.
Popular Opinion of Travelling in a Relationship
If you search on Google for ‘travelling and relationships’, most of the results conclude that you have to make a choice between the two. It’s fair to say that a huge number of relationships break down due to the fact that one half wants to travel whereas the other doesn’t. It is also true that you shouldn’t have to give up a passion such as travelling for another person, as you will end up feeling like a caged bird. Travelling is such a huge lifestyle choice, and we all know that if you don’t get it, you just don’t get it. If you are in a relationship that makes you feel trapped, get the hell out of there and leave them behind!
My Opinion of Travelling in a Relationship
However, I am tempted to disagree with the general idea that you simply can’t travel in a relationship. Sure, it’s a completely different experience and you will have to sacrifice certain things: privacy, appearances, some finances, and the freedom to up and go when you feel like it are the first that spring to mind with me. On the other hand you get to experience the world with another person, sharing so many special moments and adventures with them. Hey, some of the things that you lose are actually for the best! I have lived and travelled with my boyfriend for so long, he’s seen me at my most basic and gross – smelly, make-up-less, and tired, yet he still loves me and I don’t have any fear about him seeing the real me! There will always be somebody to turn to and say ‘did you see that?!’, there’s always somebody there encouraging you to step outside your comfort zone – or maybe that’s just me. I don’t want to blow my own trumpet (or do I?) but that’s the best thing about my boyfriend – he encourages this adventurous side of me that reminds me of being 10 and having no sense of fear. We trek up mountains, slide down waterfalls, and climb up waterfalls too!
Of course, the best kind of relationship for travelling is the one that has a perfect balance between shared experiences and independence. You travel and adventure together, but you also know that you can go off and do your own thing without it affecting the relationship or hurting anybody’s feelings. My boyfriend took a holiday to Pai for a few days after Christmas, whereas I took a few days down to the islands in February. I’m currently at home in the UK saving up some money, whereas he is in Sydney where I will be meeting him in May. We try to talk on the phone everyday, we’ve only Skyped twice in six weeks – it’s all very casual, and I think that’s why we work as a couple: we are one entity whilst simultaneously being our own person, and this all comes down to trust.
We are not unique in our success story, we have loads of friends that travel in couples and are really happy. Something that a lot of them haven’t done is get married and start families. I think that once you break away from any social expectations of couples, you have absolute freedom to form your own couple vibe and ethos, and this will most likely be spending your money on travel!
I’d love to hear your opinions on this – do you agree with the general rule of single travel is better than couples travel? Or are you more inclined to agree with me? What experiences have you had of relationships and travelling, let me know!